GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY STAR PLACED IN QUARANTINE!

Rocket, beloved hero of the GotG franchise, was placed into 14-day quarantine after supposedly returning to his hometown of Raccoon City! "I'm not even from there!" claimed Mr. Rocket. He then went on to say, "It's blatant Anti Procyonid Bias! First, I get all that flack from the anti-maskers... And now this!"

"Well, it's not like it's his first time in a Science Lab", stated a spokesperson from the CDC, "as soon as the incubation period is over, he will be released and can go back to trashing birdbaths and rummaging through poorly secured garbage cans like the rest of 'his kind'".

One of Mr. Rocket's Galactic Guardian compatriots (who requested to remain anonymous) commented only, "I Am Groot!".

Attorney's from the Rodents & Lagomorphs Small Marsupial Advocacy Group, 'No Harm-ints For Varmints are preparing to appeal the decision.

by Thrashpondo Pons

Gamilon Staff Writer